Bean Burger (Not) Casserole

Note: This article may contain commentary or the author's opinion.

When my bestie made this for me back when we were teens, the very first thing I asked her was what made a casserole a casserole? Like every other sixteen year old, she shrugged and said, “I don’t know”. Well, let me tell you, a casserole has to be cooked in the oven to be considered a casserole. That’s right. You all probably knew that, but I didn’t! I am telling you now, you DO NOT toss this puppy in the oven!

This dish is NOT a casserole, and I believe it needs a new name. Please feel free to tag me on Facebook or Twitter and tell me what you think the dish should be renamed!

One more thing to note, most people will recognize this dish as the kind of meal you throw together when you are nearing the end of a pay cycle and funds aren’t readily available. In other words it’s cheap. In more “offensive” terms, it’s for the “budget challenged”. Poor people food. Okay? That’s what I’m trying to avoid saying, but then I remember that the right don’t get all bent out of shape being called rich or poor, do we?

No. We don’t.

Anyhow, lets make this bad boy!

Bean Burger Chili (feels redundant)

Sweet Chili (?)


  1. 2 large cans of pork and beans in tomato sauce
  2. 8 oz can of condensed tomato soup
  3. 1 lb ground beef
  4. 1/2 onion, diced
  5. 2 Tbsp of garlic
  6. 2 Tbsp of brown sugar
  7. 2 Tbsp of mustard
  8. 1 can of biscuits (whichever brand preferred)


  • Let’s start by browning the meat. Once the meat is browned, we will add the diced up onion and the tablespoons of garlic.

  • Once these are combined, you are going to add the cans of beans and pork, and the tomato soup, and get them softly simmering? That sounds like a good cooking term, so we’ll stick with that.
  • Go ahead and throw in the mustard and the brown sugar. *
  • Let it simmer and stir occasionally while you get to the single most difficult part of the meal.


  • Remove the biscuits from the fridge and preheat the oven based on the instructions.
  • Carefully pull on that silver or red tab thingy near the top. Now, you want to be careful with this because it will pop and it will scare you!
  • DON’T DROP THE BISCUITS WHEN IT POPS! If you drop the biscuits, pick them back up! (This is not a joke, these were actual rules I was taught as an EMT about not dropping a baby during delivery. DON’T DROP THE BABY, but if you do, pick it back up!)
  • Cover a cookie sheet with aluminum foil, then place your biscuits on the sheet.
  • Make fun of anyone who can’t say aluminum
  • Bake the biscuits for as long as instructed on the package.

* Note: Depending on your tastes, you may want to add more of the brown sugar or mustard beyond the initial measurements.


After the biscuits are done, serve up your chili stuff and enjoy! Don’t forget to tell me what you guys think we should name this cheap, tasty, high protein meal.

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